A fantastic cast, a truly horrible film, that only bares a passing resemblance to the classic novel by Alexander Dumas. And that’s unfortunate, because as I said, fantastic cast. Ray Stevenson, Luke Evans, Matthew Macfayden, Milla Jovovich, Orlando Bloom, Christoph Waltz, Mads Mikkelsen and Juno Temple star in this horrible retelling. It features lots of…
Tag: horrible
The Legend of the Lone Ranger (1981) – William A. Fraker
There are a few things to redeem the 1981 iteration of the Lone Ranger story, it has a score by John Barry, and features Christopher Lloyd as the film’s baddie. But beyond that, this one is pretty horrible. The story, while violent, isn’t layered, sophisticated or much stronger than a grade-school tale. And that’s to…
Mortal Kombat (1995) – Paul W.S. Anderson
Paul W.S. Anderson loves his video game properties it seems, and in 1995, he delivered the first version that tried to create a narrative around an incredibly popular fighting game, and his first ‘big’ film. Some would argue that this was incredibly stupid idea, and yet, there are people who love this iteration. While the…
Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (2009) – Jack Perez
How bad? So bad. The next title in DK Canada’s highly enjoyable Monsters in the Movies is so horribly bad it doesn’t even come close to the so bad it’s good concept. This is just a horrible horrible horrible example of shoddy filmmaking, terrible computer graphics, and not even wooden acting, closer to soggy cardboard…
Killer Ape (1953) – Spencer Gordon Bennet
I knew that they all can’t be winners, but this one was scrape off the bottom of your shoe bad. Killer Ape with one time Tarzan, Johnny Weismuller as Jungle Jim is the next film in DK Canada’s always enjoyable Monsters in the Movies book. This entry, in the chapter on monstrous apes, was just…
Captive Wild Woman (1943) – Edward Dmytryk
John Carradine as a detached, and insane scientist, who somehow still gets work, an animal trainer who wants a shot at the big top, and a gorilla suit that becomes a beautiful women with strange powers over the animals of the circus. It’s all here in the next big title in DK Canada’s Monsters in…
Le Notti Del Terrore (1981) – Andrea Bianchi
Somehow, we’re still in the so bad, we’re not quite sure they’ve come around to good again section of the zombie oeuvre in DK Canada’s Monsters in the Movies. I’m definitely getting a fresh perspective on this sub-genre as it seems I’ve been very fortunate in my selection of zombie movies up to this time….
The Boy Who Cried Werewolf (1973) – Nathan Juran
Have I told you how much I hate when people shoot day for night? Ugh. And it is so prevalent in the next film recommended from DK Canada’s Monsters in the Movies book as I continue exploring the werewolf chapter. Honestly, this one is pretty horrible. It’s budget is so strained that it feels more…
Plan 9 From Outer Space (1959) – Ed Wood Jr.
While not necessarily a vampire movie, Plan 9 From Outer Space, undeniably one of the worst films ever made (which in turn made it a cult classic), is the next title in the vampire section of John Landis’ Monsters in the Movies from DK Canada. The film does feature a plan to resurrect the dead,…
Blood of Dracula (1957) – Herbert L. Strock
I knew some of the films I would watch as I work my way through John Landis’ Monsters in the Movies (available from DK Canada) would be bad, I don’t think I was ready for how bad. Blood of Dracula is that bad. A horrible film that required a lot to drink in its hour…
The Mind Reels 