Did we need a Road House re-boot/re-imagining? No, but the locations make for a pretty picture. But that doesn’t mean it has the charm of the original, most of which was because of the casting of Patrick Swayze and Sam Elliott. This time out, Jake Gyllenhaal takes on the lead role of Dalton, a former UFC fighter in this iteration who takes a gig working as a bouncer at a road house in the Florida Keys.

Trouble ensues.

Like I said the locations, predominantly the Dominican Republic standing in for Florida, and the set and production design of the actual Road House is pretty solid. But that doesn’t mean it’s a good film. Sure director Liman makes sure the music in the road house is appropriate bar band material, and there is some interesting camera work for the fights .

He’s hired by Frankie (Jessica Williams, who is always wonderful to see) and Dalton finds himself dealing with Brandt (Billy Magnussen) who is determined to grab the land the road house is on for his own nefarious regions, urged on by a prisoned father.

To help Brandt stir things up, and force Frankie and Dalton out, his father sends in Knox (Conor McGregor) to deal with things.

Very familiar material, heck, there’s even a doctor/love interest for Dalton, Ellie (Daniela Melchior).

In other words it’s not quite a retread, but it’s all very stereotypical with no real surprises, and as much as I like Gyllenhaal, he doesn’t have the same zen charm in his portrayal that Swayze brought to his interpretation.

The thing that really ruins the film is Conor McGregor. He may be a great UFC fighter, but he’s a crap actor. He has a one-note delivery system, and he walks like there’s something stuck up his backside.

And while you definitely want to see someone who is in as good a shape as Gyllenhaal to square off against him, you should most assuredly want someone who can at least emote a little bit.

I’m not going to say this movie was a complete waste, it’s a very pretty looking film, and the fights choreography and shots are quite good, but because it’s a reimagining, and the casting isn’t what it should be, there’s nothing to really elevate this film beyond popcorn entertainment… you see it and after it’s done you’ve already forgotten most of it.

But you won’t forget the fact that McGregor just can NOT act. Ugh.